McKenna Knows 'Dysfunctional'

McKenna Knows ‘Dysfunctional’

By: Rachel Marsden

It’s no wonder Canada’s ambassador to the United States, Frank McKenna, is being touted as the next leader of Canada’s Hopelessly Perpetual Governing Party. It sounds like he’s already jacked up on the official party Kool-Aid.

Exemplifying the soft-touch diplomacy of a drunken uncle giving a wedding toast, McKenna stood in front of America’s representative to our country at a Toronto business luncheon last week and called the man’s government “dysfunctional”.

McKenna denounced the fact that Americans have “so much independence of political party loyalty…that everybody in their own way is a freelancer, going off in different directions”. He compared it to the Canadian system where “essentially we have party discipline, and if you can convince the Prime Minister or a minister that something should be done, invariably it can end up being done.”

You go, Frankie! The pressure of having to worry about putting one’s own conscience and constituents’ interests ahead of those of the party is just too much. When you’re eyeing that Cabinet post or cushy patronage gig, who needs it?

American-style democracy is just such a pain. Take the recent confirmation of new US Supreme Court Chief Justice John Roberts. All that questioning, grilling, and voting! How bloody exhausting. As McKenna reminds us, it’s so much easier here in Canada where you only have to worry about puckering up to a limited set of derrieres.

Ironically, around the same time that McKenna was reveling in nationalistic bluster, an interim report by the Canadian Senate Committee on National Security and Defence found the underfunded Canadian military on the verge of collapse. See? That’s the kind of hell that breaks loose when firmly entrenched senators who see their political bootlicking days in the rearview mirror talk to the hoi polloi about “the issues” in one of those pesky democratic exercises.

True to Liberal head-in-the-sand form, Defence Minister Bill Graham dismissed the report. But the findings—derived from widespread national and expert consultation—confirm that Canada is an enemy target because of our western values; that leeching off the American military makes us nothing more than a “virtual protectorate, a pale replica of an independent state”; and that “influence is predicated on paying your international dues, and Canada is not”.

Despite all the feel-good rhetoric coming from our ruling elites, here’s the reality: Canada is more dependent on that “dysfunctional” American government for our defence than ever before. And our sovereignty has never been at greater risk.

According to the International Institute for Strategic Studies, Canada’s military ranks 58^th out of 175 countries in terms of size, despite having the second largest land mass in the world. We’re essentially on par with Cuba, Singapore, Uzbekistan and Ecuador.

“But President Chimpy “Moron” Bushitler and Vice-President Dick Halliburton have to protect us,” say the lefties. “We’re their largest trading partner!”

The USA doesn’t need Canada nearly as much as some might think. According to the CIA World Fact book, while we rely on America for 59% of our imports and 85% of our exports, we only comprise 17% of their increasingly diverse import portfolio (with China sitting at 14%) and 23% of their exports.

We couldn’t even bother to make a symbolic show of support for the ballistic missile defence program. It’s not like we even had to contribute anything—just show up at their kegger with an empty cup in hand and eat all their finger food. Instead, our Liberal government snubbed them

When you’re in line at the food bank, it might not be such a good idea to tell the guy handing you the free bag of groceries that he’s an idiot. Without the United States, the best we can do to defend our own interests is poke our enemies with those little Canadian flag pins from Heritage Canada or pelt them with anti-American agitprop videos produced by the CBC.

Maybe if Liberals like McKenna and Graham would get out of the tub and stop chugging their own bathwater, Canada wouldn’t have to rely on America-bashing to carve out its own identity as a truly independent and sovereign nation.

PUBLISHED: TORONTO SUN (October 6/05)