In the Heat - and Stupidity

In the Heat - and Stupidity - of Battle

By: Rachel Marsden

As the Israeli military continues to kill Hezbollah Islamic terrorists in Lebanon, finally a country other than the U.S. is taking a turn at doing the heavy lifting in the terror war.

But where there's war, there's also idiocy. Here are just a few examples from the past week:

* Some media commentators are saying Lebanon is an innocent victim. Hezbollah bombed the U.S. Embassy in Beirut, with the support of Syria and Iran, back in 1983. Lebanon has repeatedly been asked, most recently via UN Resolution 1559 in 2004, to disarm Hezbollah. Instead, it has allowed the terrorists to sit in the Lebanese parliament. That's like having Tony Soprano as a houseguest. One day, someone will inevitably bust down your door and trash the place, with you in it.

* A few analysts say this is the start of World War III. Where have these people been? World War III began when Islamic terrorists ventured out of the Middle East and perpetrated an act of war on nearly 3,000 people from 87 countries on 9/11, and continued with last year's London subway bombings.

* Thousands of Canadians were in Lebanon when the bombing started. Here's a press release the UN issued: "The Secretary-General condemns the continued bombings in Lebanon, where an explosion in Beirut late Saturday killed two people and injured at least eight others. He is especially saddened that this latest attack, the third in Lebanon in only a week, was carried out on the eve of Easter." The thing is, this notice was from March of last year. How freaking thick do you have to be to not notice people being killed around you, or the five State Department warnings issued since November 2004? Maybe investing in a basic Internet connection would have saved some of these folks (and us) all that whining about the lack of air conditioning during the evacuation.

* Critics here and abroad complained about the speed of evacuation efforts. Sorry if we don't rush right over there on demand! It's a war zone, not the fitting room area at the GAP. Heaven forbid we take our time to prevent potential terrorists from catching a free flight to our country. I don't think we should be using Canadian passports to determine whom to rescue. The chief weapons buyer for the Tamil Tigers, and several al-Qaida terrorists, have fake Canadian passports. Instead, we should be checking for Shoppers Drug Mart or Safeway points cards as proof of Canadian residency.

* Exiled hate preacher Omar Bakri, to whom the 9/11 suicide bombers are bigger than The Beatles, now wants the Brits to bail him out of Lebanon. Hey Omar, this is your Super Bowl Sunday and the Israeli Defence Forces are waiting for you. Get in the game, big guy!

* Britain's Sun newspaper reports that 27 Iranian suicide bombers are heading to Lebanon. The group's spokesman says that the wannabe martyrs "were picked from 55,000 who registered in Iran. They were briefed and have completed the 'relevant courses.'" I'm guessing they were at the bottom of the class, because the star students at self-detonation school wouldn't have survived the final exam, would they? But in a war rife with idiots, they'll fit right in.

PUBLISHED: TORONTO SUN (July 27/06)